A Dilemma Of The Heart

April 5, 1978

In two days, a family of Yuqui Indians would be coming over from the Rio Chimore. That group of nomads was befriended by our missionaries back in the sixties. We were still hoping and praying that the group we were looking for at the Pension would come back into our area. If they did, we thought it would be a big help to have a family with us that was fluent in the language and knowledgeable in their shared culture. Alan Foster was the only one on our team who could speak the Yuqui language.

Paul Short and I dug a hole and built an outhouse over it for our visiting Indians to use during the weeks they would be with us. Our effort was not up to our standards, but it would be better than the one they used in their home village.

I finished the morning cutting weeds in the banana patch with my machete.  Paul and I planed to go hunting, again, after dark.

April 6, 1978

Our teammates who made the survey down towards Grether returned today. They were tired and dirty. They did not find the results we were hoping for down there, so, for the time being, we will stay here and wait for the nomads to come to us. For years, this area was part of the Indian’s stomping grounds for part of the year and that was why our base camp was here.

Of course, Matt Castagna returned with the team. It would be nice to have a fellow single guy to talk to, again. Also, I would get a break from my cooking every other week!

April 7, 1978

The mission plane came in today and brought the Yuqui family, along with some supplies and the mail. It was my first time to meet some indigenous people that our mission worked with in Bolivia. They seemed nice, but were going to take some getting used to!  I could not understand them, but they smiled a lot and kept talking to us in their language. We answered back in ours.

I got a letter from my mom and dad, another from my brother, Dennis, and one from Debbie. Those I gladly opened and read with delight. There was also a letter from Charlotte, a girl from my church back in Montana.

That one was not so welcome! She was a nice girl and I was flattered that she liked me, but our life goals were different! In past correspondence, I tried to discourage her, hoping to let her down gently, but made it plain that she should look elsewhere for a husband! In my last letter to her, I even asked her not to write me back! With that, I hoped I was rid of her, for her own sake, but today’s letter made it plain that she had not given up the chase. Guilt or desperation, I didn’t know which, made her write, “I don’t know what else to say,” multiple times in her letter.

We were both part of a post-college group that hung out together at church. Most of us were single. I had never asked her out on a date, nor had a serious conversation with her, for that matter. I hoped I wasn’t guilty of leading her on in any way. I did feel sorry for her, though, but she had not taken my written hint, so maybe ignoring her letter and any future ones would be the best course of action, even if it broke her heart! It was a dilemma I had no desire to deal with, but it had to be done!

There was one letter not on the plane, that disappointed me in its absence. That was a letter from CJ’s family. They used to be so good at writing, keeping in touch with me when I was in language school and during my two years of waiting for a visa to go to Colombia, a visa that never came. They always seemed glad to see me when I visited them.  When I left their house to travel to Florida to catch the flight to Bolivia they told me to be sure and write to them. I did upon arrival in Cochabamba. Two months were now passed and there was still no answer from them. I sent them a second letter on today’s flight. I was sure they were busy, but I considered them my best friends in the world, and for that, it was hard for me to be patient!

Fin

This story was from the category Tales From Green Hell. If you would like to read more of my experiences in the jungles of Bolivia, please click on that link below.

More Writings by Phil

Leave a comment